Disclaimer: Oh, right. No money made, no ingfringement intended, all Paramount's. Except for the storyline. That is all mine.

J/C
NC-17

Summary: First dinnerdate after confessing to love, this evening is all for Kathryn.

Sequel to 'Just A Moment Ago ...' I suggest you read that first.

2. All for Kathryn

By GB

Last minute jitters.

There were no other explanation for the shivers forcing through her body making her wrap her towel around herself so hard she could hardly breathe.

Janeway, a formidable yet seemingly fragile starship captain, looked at herself in the mirror. Her skin a little pale, dusted over with faint freckles, rosy after the bath, her hair mussed from being towelled into an auburn cloud around her head.

And Chakotay would be here in less than ten minutes. Why was she so paralysed by that? She had had dinner with him in her quarters countless times and now she was nervous, shivering and loosing her usual commanding posture.

If only a little red alert would save her? But no, of course they were travelling through an amazingly quite part of the  Delta quadrant. Not a Borg cube in site, not even a little hostile probe of any kind.

She could not do this. She had to find her comm badge and just let him know that …

“You look adorable.”

The husky, soft voice of the man in her thoughts startled her and she took a quick step backwards, almost falling back into the tub. Chakotay, of course he had managed to be early, grabbed her arms and pulled her into safety.

“I am sorry, I thought you heard me calling from the living room”, he said, smiling. “I rang the door, I paged you twice. You had me worried. I thought you had changed your mind.”

I had, I had, she thought but couldn’t speak standing so close to him – once again dressed in only a towel, but this time dressed in a towel approximately four hours after confessing her love for this man.

A huge difference.

“Kathryn?”

He was frowning now, uncertain of her silence and huge eyes staring at him.

“Uh … yes?”

“Are you alright?”

“Oh, yes … I am fine, Chakotay. I just … you startled me a little.”

His eyes narrowed and he started stroking her naked arms, slowly, from her shoulders to her wrists and up again.

“You are cold, shivering. Are you afraid of me, Kathryn? Do you regret …”

She did. And she did not. She loved him and she did not regret anything she had ever told him. Perhaps there had been time when they had let each other down, but they had grown from it, learned from it. He had been her saviour and she had been his.

“No I don’t regret anything”, she stated. “I just found myself frozen in here, like suspended in time, almost. I thought … I was afraid that …”

“Don’t”, he said and hugged her close. “Don’t be afraid. I don’t want you nervous around me. Just think of me as your old friend Chakotay, coming for dinner. You did intend to feed me, didn’t you?”

She smiled against his shoulder. He was always like this, defusing the situation with humour.

“I did. I mean, I do”, she answered. “But I lost my way in here, I supposed.”

He chuckled.

“Need a compass in your own bathroom, Kathryn?”

“Funny.”

“I could show you the way, I suppose.”

“Oh, can you?”

“Yes.”

He tipped her head back by tenderly pulling her tousled, damp hair. His lips were gentle and warm against her trembling lips, so different from the afternoon when he had forcefully kissed her like a man possessed. Now he traced her lips with his tongue over and over, made it his duty to relax her and entice her at the same time.

Janeway sighed into his mouth, he was so skilled with those lips. He was the most tender man she had ever met, so restrained and careful in everything he did. He seldom raised his voice but still had an aura of gentle command around him. She herself knew she was much more intimidating and forceful. He was her opposite, he was indeed a great first officer, complementing his captain so well.

And now, he was making his captain go weak at her knees, kissing her even deeper, pulling her towel lower.

Her towel …

Startled and suddenly awkwardly shy, she flinched and pulled back a little. Gazing uncertainly into his dark eyes, she blushed, feeling ridiculous.

“Dinner?” she reminded him breathlessly.

“Oh, yes. Dinner”, he smiled back and let her go.

She shivered and moved past him into her bedroom. “I’ll just get dressed, I’ll be with you in a minute.”

“I will wait for you, Kathryn”, he said casually and went into the living room.

She had managed her mother’s old recipe without any need for ‘alerts to the sickbay’, Chakotay’s standard joke whenever she cooked. The red wine she had served with dinner had helped to relax her and now when they were both sitting on the couch, things seemed almost normal.

She leaned back, one arm along the back of the couch, and gazed at the stars they past at warp six. It was a familiar site, she loved this part of being in space. Seeing the faraway stars that could provide so much interesting adventure, exploring, new understandings.

She was born to live on a starship, to explore the unknown, to command. She would not be satisfied doing anything else, she knew that. Still, being trapped in the Delta quadrant was not exactly how she would have planned it. It had given them endless amounts of research materials, but they had had all paid a far too high a price for it.

She missed Earth, she missed her mother, her sister, her dog …

But sitting here with the man she had come to love made it more endurable. If this was her destiny, to travel the galaxy towards the Alpha quadrant for the rest of her life with this man by her side, she could do much worse.

The burden of command always weighed heavily only her shoulders. Sometimes she buckled under it, but so far she had managed. She had walked a fine line many times. The void, the Equinox, the Borg – they had all been trying times. But now she was here, sitting so close to him, this large man with such peace within him.

“Chakotay”, she mumbled, really just wanting to say his name.

“Yes?”

“Chakotay”, she said again without meeting his eyes, a lopsided smile playing at the left corner of her mouth.

“Kathryn?”

“Chakotay.” She slid over, closer to him.

“Mm?”

Placing herself on his lap, arms around his neck, she bent her head and kissed him.

Chakotay put his arms around her compact form and pulled her closer. “Darling”, he said huskily. “You taste so wonderful.”

“It is the wine.”

“No”, he disagreed. “It is you.”

She kissed him again, let her tongue enter his eager mouth, caressing inside his lips, against his own tongue in slow, lingering, velvet movements.

Chakotay groaned and his big hands moved leisurely over her back and her sides, touching her, setting her skin on fire underneath the soft material of the dress. She had put on the blue dress she knew he liked so much and the look in his eyes when she had come out of the bedroom had been worth the effort.

His lips broke free and travelled leisurely along her jaw, behind her ear and down the silky skin of her neck. Janeway trembled against his hands, moaned softly in a husky, thrilling sort of way, making his lips more eager, sucking her skin in between his teeth.

“Kathryn”, he breathed. “I want to taste all of you, you taste so good. I want to take your breasts in my mouth and devour them. I thought I could settle for being polite and regard this as a first date, but you are too much for me, darling. I need …” His voice broke and his right hand found the buttons at the front of her dress and started to work on them.

Janeway smiled and let him. She thought it was endearing and very gentleman like to try and be proper, but surely their eternal dance around each other ever since New Earth had been enough courtship.

Her dressed were being pushed off her shoulders, his hands feverish now in their attempt to reach her skin.

“What do you like, my Kathryn?” Chakotay asked in a whisper against her temple as his hands liberated her from her white bra.

“What do you mean?”

“Do you like to be kissed here?” he asked gently touching her breasts with his knuckles while he gazed into her eyes. “Or do you prefer to have them pinched, pulled? Or a more direct full hand squeeze? You must realise that though I know very much about you, I have absolutely now idea how you want to be touched.”

A deep crimson rose on her cheeks, spreading like wild fire down her neck to her chest. Nobody, not once had anyone ever asked her this. Was this what loving and making love with Chakotay would be like? Direct questions, a kind of pillow talk that she had never participated in, mostly because it had never been initiated before by her previous lovers.

“Oh, I … I suppose I like both the kissing and the pinching and pulling, I think”, she answered shyly, smiling nervously.

“So kisses would be a good way to start then?” he asked, sliding the dress further down, leaving her open to his interested gaze.

“Yes, I would say so.”

This was killing her. His words were exciting her, making her blush even more.

He lowered his head, found her right nipple and sucked it into his mouth without any trepidation. Janeway gasped, arched into him, grabbed his head and pulled him closer. He sucked her into his hot mouth, his tongue working relentlessly at her, leaving no room for fear or uncertainty.

“Chakotay”, she cried softly. “Oh my God, Chakotay … just like that. Don’t stop …”

He didn’t stop. He was all over her breast, kissing it, licking it and mercilessly sucking at it while his free hand dealt with the other one, pinched the other nipple, pulled it just enough not to hurt her but hard enough to make her go all limp in his arms from the agonising pleasure.

For being a man of peace he made wild, passionate love, she thought hazily. All she could do at the moment was to hold on, to relish in the feelings he was intent on giving her.

Without realising how it happened she found herself reclined across his lap, held up against his mouth with his right hand around her back and the left inconspicuously raising the hem of her dress over her knees. All too dazed by his kisses and the attention he kept giving her breasts with his determined mouth, she allowed the persistent hand.

He slowly traced her legs above her knees, felt along her silky thighs, lingering there for a long time as she grew more and more impatient. The touch were like trails of fire and she could not hold back her own sounds of passion.

“Touch me, please, touch me”, she whispered. “Don’t make me beg, Chakotay. It has been so long and I … I need you to touch me.” She spread her legs without knowing it, wanting desperately him to find the way to the source of her heat.

“I will, darling, don’t worry. Not just yet. This evening is for you. Take your time, trust me, I won’t leave you, I will make you come so hard, you will never forget this evening. This is our first time and it is all for you.”

Chakotay’s voice was magical, hoarse, passionate. He was trembling against her, his hands rough but still gentle, caring. It was driving her absolutely mad.

“But I need it now”, she whimpered and her restless hips moved in his lap.

“I know you do, my Kathryn. Tell me what you need.”

Excited and too far gone into this passion to feel embarrassed she held on to him in the midst of her fire.

“I want you to take me, I need you to fill me and be hot against me.”

“So, the fire is eating at you, Kathryn?”

“Yes. I must … you  must …”, she sobbed involuntarily and that might have been what made him have mercy on her.

He let his hand slide up to the junction between her shivering thighs and found her very wet and very ready for his touch. He went beneath her panties, pulled them away just enough to make room for his strong fingers that entered her, sinking deeply into the satin wetness that welcomed him.

“Yes, yes …”, was all she could say before her voice gave in and all she could do was moan and arch against his hand, undulating, trying to feel all of him.

“There, Kathryn? Is it good? Do you feel that?” Chakotay was kissing her, talking to her in that husky, deep voice that made her crazy.

His fingers thrust inside her, softly massaging her, finding the spot inside her that made her actually scream twice, hoarse, throaty screams of passion and love.

When his thumb reached the aching nodule she was at the final edge, swaying, almost falling ... then taking the dive into that golden sea, hanging in mid air, shattered into a million pieces. Precious seconds ticking by, her body bucking at his touch, arching against the pleasure, before receding into soft tremors, interrupted by small convulsions, accompanied by sobs of happiness, fulfilment.

She lay limp across his lap. He had pulled her panties up and the hem of her dress down, now he was holding her against her chess, tenderly rocking her as she softly cried, satisfied, happy and needing him more than ever.

When she finally stopped crying and still didn’t speak, he put his hand under her chin and made her look at him.

“Are you alright, darling?” he asked tenderly.

“Yes. I‘m fine”, she answered. “You were wonderful to me.”

“I told you. Tonight was for you. I am glad you were … pleased.”

“Oh, I was very pleased. But what about you, Chakotay? You must …”

“There will be plenty of time for that later. Don’t you think I understand what a big step this was for you? To let me this close and to let me see you like this? This is enough for me for tonight.”

Janeway was stunned. He was truly the most amazing man she had ever met. Just as she thought she had him figured out he did something that threw her. Putting her feelings, her satisfaction above his own shouldn’t had surprised her, it was in his nature. But such a selfless action was almost too much …

She wiped new tears away and smiled up at him.

“I love you”, she said in a broken voice.

“I love you, too”, he whispered and kissed her. “You will never know how wonderful and alluring you look when you come, when you allow yourself to be this vulnerable. The mere fact that you let me touch you, to give you that, is more than enough right now. I will never forget this moment. You are such a beautiful woman, Kathryn. This was pure pleasure.”

She blushed again. Of course, even in a room with only a quarter illumination he would have seen exactly what she looked like when she ‘came so hard she would never forget’ as he put it earlier.

“It was truly a pleasure worth remembering”, she agreed and hugged him. “But next time …”

He chuckled.

“Don’t make me nervous now, Kathryn.”

She smiled broadly.

“Oh, but you should be, darling. Very nervous. You have been most inspiring this evening.”

He shuddered in mock terror.

“Oh no, I liberated a insatiable, sex craving vixen.”

 Janeway managed an angelic smile.